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Barbara Elkington passed on December 2020, her children describe her as a dedicated mother, teacher

A sepia-colored old photo of Barbara sitting in a striped poka dotted dress in the middle with her husband on her right and her son on his lap, her daughter on the left of her and two children sitting inside a truck behind them
Elkington with her family.
Photo by Ruthann Wetekia

At the age of 84, Barbara Elkington, a retired BYU–Hawaii English professor, passed away in her home surrounded by her family. Her children said they have no doubt about the way their mother felt about each of them as she would tell them daily how much she loved them and how proud she was of them.

A Facebook post shared by Elkington’s family, read, “Barbara passed peacefully at home with her family there and her beloved dogs on the bed with her on Dec. 18, 2020. Barbara was a retired English professor and her family is grateful for everyone who loved their mother. Barbara loved living in Hawaii and teaching at BYUH and all the students over the years.”

A brief biography 

Elkington was raised by her parents, Jo and Ruth Miller, in Oregon and graduated from Jefferson High in 1954. Elkington attended BYU in Provo and received her bachelor’s degree in English in 1958 and a master’s degree in journalism in 1960.

In 1959, she worked as a reporter and photographer in McMinnville, Ore. In 1963, Elkington was hired to teach English and journalism at the Church College of Hawaii, now BYUH. She continued to teach at BYUH until her retirement in 2001.

She married Wahanui Tupaea Elkington and together they had six children, 14 grandchildren and one great grandchild, according to her daughters.

Elkington’s daughter, Ruthann Wetekia, said her mother was a tall, well-spoken, intelligent and kind person. “She always says ‘Hang in there,’ and ‘I love you.’” Wetekia said she learned from her mother to stay strong in the faith of Jesus Christ, to work hard and to always be honest.

A life of faithful service

While Elkington chose to attend BYU in Provo, for her first three years she was not a member. However, no one knew it, Wetekia shared. “Mom said she probably gave some strange prayers when she was studying there,” Wetakia joked. However, with her brother David’s encouragement, Elkington joined the Church on July 5, 1959.

Wetekia said no matter what happened throughout her mother’s life, her testimony remained strong. “She was a member of the Laie 2nd Ward since about 1964. She gave a lot of service throughout the years.” She had a posse of friends who help each other, and they were all active and strong members in the Church, Wetekia commented.

Her daughter, Elizabeth Shaw, shared, “She was very strong in her faith. She served in so many positions in the Church. That was something she was known for and something that I always admire about her. She served without the need for recognition or praise. She served because it was the right thing to do.”

Shaw also described her mother as a very kind and loving person. “When I talked to my friends after she passed, each of them were so grateful to my mom for making them feel loved and valued. Many of them had moved into our house over the years.

“During a time when they were struggling with relationships with parents or boyfriends, my mom made sure they knew that they were loved no matter what. She had meaningful conversations and made a difference in their lives,” Shaw added.

Memories of Mom

Wetekia said she has many wonderful memories with her mother. “She was the fastest typist I’d ever seen. She’d type my school papers on her typewriter, and it was like a cacophony of keystrokes.”

Wetekia shared when she had her senior recital at BYUH in 1989, her mother made the best refreshments in the history of recitals. “When I’d have nightmares, I’d sleep on the sheepskin on the floor next to her, and she’d hold my hand,” Wetekia recalled.

Another daughter, Maria Zink, said her mother was very brave. “When I was about 8 years old, we saw a couple arguing and the man struck the woman. Mom went right up to the man and gave him a ‘what for.’ She took the woman’s hand, and we walked away. I was so scared, shocked and surprised, but Mom helped this woman.”

Zink said her mother ended most phone calls by telling her how proud she was of all her children. “She was a very patient person. She rarely lost her patience with a house full of us.”

Shaw shared, “She had a very dry sense of humor. She would often say something and people weren’t sure if she was joking or serious. That was when it was the funniest, seeing my friends confused and not knowing if they should laugh or apologize for something.”

Shaw said, “I was fortunate enough to be able to have a FaceTime call with her the day she passed. Even with her decline she was able to tell me that she loved me.”

Shaw said there was not a doubt in any of her children about the way their mother felt about each of them. “She often told us that she was proud of us and that she loved us. She was happy that we were good people.”

Funeral plans

Wetekia said they were not yet able to have a funeral because of COVID-19. “She wanted to be interred with her parents in Portland, Oregon, so we’d like to take her there when things calm down.”

Wetekia shared, “Her instructions were simple. Cremation and serve ice cream sundaes at the service. We’d like to do that here in Hawaii, when COVID-19 is under better control.”

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