BYU–Hawaii students said when people focus on things they can control, rather than things outside of their control, it will help calm their fears about the future and help them enjoy the precious time they have at BYUH.
Passion and potential
Josefa Kacabotevakadua Rupeni, an alumnus from Fiji who majored in communication technology and information systems, said he had a lot of anxieties about whether or not he involved himself enough in academics and activities. He said he wanted to have fully experienced everything BYUH had to offer. He shared, “I was asking myself, ‘What have I done in the past years that helped me reach my full potential?’” He said he worried about not reaching his full potential at BYUH and running out of time to do so.
Rupeni explained finding time to do things he’s passionate about helped him cope with the anxieties he felt surrounding graduation. He said, “The last thing I wanted to do was turn something I loved into something I hate.”
Rupeni also advised students to focus on what they are in control of, rather than putting their time and efforts into things beyond their control. “The time students have here at BYUH is precious, so they should focus on things they find uplifting and shouldn’t be questioning themselves,” he said.
Do good, be good
Shan Arumugam, a senior from Southern India majoring in hospitality and tourism management, said he has mixed feelings about the future, but he puts his trust in fate. However, he added good planning helps calm his anxieties.
“When I think about taking the next steps, I believe in fate. I plan and set realistic goals. I know if I work hard now, it will be worth it in the end,” Arumugam shared. “My motto is, ‘Do good, be good.’ I believe as long as I abide by my motto, I won’t get overcome by anxieties about the future.”
Nomungerel Enkhtuvshin, an alumna from Mongolia who graduated in Fall 2020 and majored in psychology, said doing her academic training at BYUH Counseling Services has helped her manage her anxieties of the future.
Due to the COVID-19 pandemic, Enkhtuvshin said it was hard to find an internship or a job to help her husband while he was still in school. The difficult job hunt caused her a lot of anxiety, she said. However, she eventually found an internship.
Enkhtuvshin said she felt blessed she found this internship, but the uncertainty behind what she is going to do after weighs on her. To cope with these fears, she said she tries to keep an open mind and heart. “This anxiety is normal and even beneficial. It can help us be better prepared for things that are coming in the future.”
Journal your emotions
Like Rupeni, Enkhtuvshin said, “I try to do my part and understand what’s under my control and do what I can. The things that I can’t control, I try not to worry about them.”
She said she joined the mindfulness group held by Counseling Services, where she became more aware of her emotions. She continued, “We can accept our anxieties by being mindful of our anxieties.”
By practicing the skills taught in the Dedicated Worry Time class, Enkhtuvshin said she felt she could address her anxieties for a period of time and then stopped worrying about them.
She also said journal writing has helped with this process. “I write down my feelings and emotions. ... I separated the anxiety from myself and put it in my journal.”
According to Enkhtuvshin, being aware of her feelings and emotions helps her keep a positive mindset about the future and pushes her to keep going.