Student parents of five children said college was a challenge, but without that experience, their families would not be as strong and goal-oriented. These parents highlighted prioritizing their faith, managing their time, and working as a team is key to their success.
The four families interviewed also shared they made sacrifices, such as only sleeping a few hours, but were grateful to live in TVA, surrounded by many international friends.
Zabrina Peters, a freshman from California majoring in elementary education, said, “Our children are our biggest motivation. When you know that someone depends on you, it changes you faster than anything.”
Her husband, Kenneth Peters, an alumnus from Laie, echoed his wife by saying being a student parent motivates him to do everything effectively and in a short time. He shared he always does his work, homework, and chores with maximum effort to save time.
Zabrina Peters shared when she was single, she was not as focused on her studies. After having five children, she noted how she felt changed, focused, and motivated.
“I just finished my first semester with straight As. My motherhood skills, such as multitasking, helped me succeed in school.”
Student spouse and mother of five, Brittany Suafoa, said she and her husband are setting a good example for their children. “Our children see the hard work and sacrifices we make to gain knowledge, to improve ourselves, to provide for them and to contribute to our community. We set examples for them, so they can learn to make sacrifices as well.”
Student parent blessings
Chelsea Wily, a recent alumna from Laie who majored in elementary education, said being a student parent helped her husband, Joshua Wily, a senior from Laie majoring in social work, and their five kids grow individually and spiritually. “We both grew up in Laie and have always been someone else’s ‘baby.’ But moving to TVA and finishing our studies was a good decision. This experience helped us be independent and grow as a family.”
She said she wants other students to not be afraid of studying and parenting at the same time. According to Chelsea Wily, she stopped studying when she had her first child, and she thought going back to school with children would be too hard, even impossible.
“But after I had my fourth child, I asked myself, ‘Who am I? What am I going to teach my children [about] who I was?’ I decided to finish my school. After we started schooling, everything fell in the right place, and we felt we were supposed to be here.
“Nothing was ever perfect. It is a lot of stress and messes all the time, but it is possible. Keep going, and eventually, you will finish … If you have children, don’t be discouraged. It can still be done. Nothing is impossible.”
Overcoming challenges
Brandon Kahaiali’i, an alumnus from Laie, said his focus is mainly on work and school, so he relies heavily on his wife, Harmony Kahaiali’i, a junior from Laie majoring in peacebuilding, to take care of the five children at home.
“I feel guilty for not being able to help my family much. It is always in the back of my mind. I feel like they are growing up without me.
“I usually have a pile of assignments, and I submit some of them late. It is very depressing. My goal was to graduate summa cum laude, but I had a few rough semesters and ended up with magna cum laude. I feel that I have done everything I could … but the days are just too short.”
Chelsea Wily shared they have so many things to do, but she focuses on each day. It helps her to go through every day with less stress, she said.
Brittany Suafoa added, “We have relied on the Lord through faith and prayer more than ever to get us through this busy time. My husband is very firm in putting God first, and we have been blessed because of his dedication. Without God’s help, it was impossible.”
Kenneth Peters said spending time with his family was a relief for him from his busy schedule, and it helped him to free his mind. “Make sure to put time aside to spend quality time with your family. Children do not remember what they have now, but they remember the memories.
“Keep pushing yourself and your spouse and always aim to be better. I am lucky to have a strong wife. She is a huge part of our family’s success. Everything will be alright in the end. If not, it is not the end yet.”
Joshua Wily said, “We have very understanding professors here. It is the best university for students who have a family. Our ward, community, professors and everything support us to succeed here.”