Every semester students may have some new experiences like new classmates, getting a new job, new co-workers, etc. Another is having new roommates and housemates.
At BYU–Hawaii, almost everyone has to live with another person, sometimes even several people. As you are living in the same room, knowing how to get along well with each other is important. It sometimes can be difficult especially since BYUH is a multicultural campus with students from different countries, backgrounds and cultures. If people don’t get along, it may evolve into conflicts.
Universities go to great lengths to help roommates get along, reports U.S. News & World Report. Here are four tips to getting along with your roommate it gathered from colleges across America:
- Don't let problems pile up. No matter how well you might get along with someone, they might start to grate your nerves. If they have a habit that annoys you, or there's a more serious problem, have an honest conversation, experts say, or risk unleashing a tirade near semester's end. "The first one to know about a roommate conflict should be the roommate," says David Tuttle, interim vice president of student affairs at Trinity University, in San Antonio. "Students often hold onto stuff and blurt it all out when things get to be too much."
- You don't have to be best friends. There are a lucky few who form lifelong bonds with their roommate, but according to college housing officials, it's not the norm. The only expectations you should have of your roommate are they respect you and the living space. Anything beyond that is a gift, not a mandate.
- Compromise. Be prepared to compromise, housing officials say. A steady give and take between you and your roommate will ease the tensions that can arise in a shared room. "It is about sharing and coming up with workable compromises that both you and your roommate are comfortable with," says Rick Moreci, director of housing services at Chicago's DePaul University. "Compromise does not have to mean sacrifice. It means working together with your roommate to determine the rules for your new living arrangement that you can both be comfortable with."
- Set rules. Though it may be awkward at first, having a frank conversation with your roommate in the first few days in an effort to set some rules will prove to be helpful long term. Whether it be about cleaning the room, listening to music or having friends over, letting your roommate know what might make you uncomfortable is important.
BYUH students also shared their tips for living with roommates. Marina Leyluai, a returned missionary who is majoring in biology from Utah, gave her suggestions:
- Respect your roommates and housemates property. “One major pet peeve is when someone touches your stuff without asking. This is important to me because you don’t want to feel like your roommate is going through your stuff, snooping, even stealing. You want to feel a sense of security in your own room.”
- Embrace each other’s differences. “This is huge because everyone does everything differently than you do. Sometimes you just need to accept that they do certain things differently and go with it. Don’t take things personally if they do it differently.”
- Choose to be happy. “Like President Uchtdorf said, ‘Let us all resolve to be happy regardless of our circumstances.’ It is more fun to be around people, especially roommates, who are happier and more grateful. So being happy is important.”
Taryn Skahill, a sophomore from Texas majoring in TESOL, shared her opinions:
- Get to know them. “Ask them where they are from and what they like to do. Just asking them simple questions about their day will help you get along better.”
- Serve them. “Simple, random acts of kindness can be meaningful and really brighten someone’s day.”
Taco Chiang, a senior from Hong Kong majoring in elementary education, gave her ideas:
- Talk with them on your own initiative. “By talking with them, you can show you are kind to others. Your heart will open to accept others and others will also get the feeling that you are friendly to them.”
- Have meals together. “When you have roommates or housemates who are from different countries, one way to approach them and get closer is to share with them the food you cook or have potluck together. Nobody doesn’t like eating or tasting new food. You can also learn their countries’ culture features from tasting their food.”
- Hang out with them. “Ask them to go shopping together, go to the beach, take a walk, etc. Just find a chance and hang out with them. By playing together, you will getting closer with each other and know more about each other, like their characteristic and hobbies.”