President Keali’i Haverly and Sister Kahoku Haverly spoke on the importance of realizing people's similarities despite their differences during the BYU–Hawaii devotional on Nov. 24. BYUH students agreed and said focusing on similarities bring unity and prevent conflict.
Different yet the same
As part of her introduction, Kahoku Haverly said, “Just as my husband and I found differences in our upbringings could be overcome with mutual respect and eventually love, so can we become beacons of the light of Christ in a world of anger, fear, contention and uncertainty.”
Keali’i Haverly, stake president of the Laie Hawaii YSA 2nd Stake and director of facilities and maintenance for the Polynesian Cultural Center, taught, “We don’t highlight our differences. We focus on what’s the same. We love God. We are strengthened by He who is greater than us. We can make the world a better place. We are all on this same Island Earth together.”
Reflecting on these teachings, their daughter-in-law, Amanda Abraham Haverly, added, “If we let ourselves focus on those differences, then they will get louder and louder, causing them to grow apart.
“I learned we can meet in the middle and find those similarities we have with each other [and] we can find peace,” said Amanda Haverly, a senior from Illinois majoring in hospitality and tourism management.
Keen Kathleen Melody Acain-Flores, a sophomore from the Philippines majoring in hospitality and tourism management, said his devotional talk was a great reminder to be always a good example to other people because who knows whose life we are going to touch.
As he recounted his experience with his wife in their early days of their lives, President Haverly said his wife was very connected to the gospel’s teachings and helped him, which softened his heart.
He said, “They were different, yet they were the same.”
Acain-Flores expressed the important part of the message was to focus on the similarities rather than the differences.
Recalling President and Sister Haverly’s differences in their early life and who they are today, Acain-Flores said, “He taught me about how we are all unique, and we have our own opinions. That doesn’t matter if we really want to work things out. Those differences will help us have more understanding with each other and focus on the similarities.”
Rahel Meyer, a senior from Germany majoring in political science and communications, said, “We tend to focus so much on the differences we overlook the apparent similarities that can help us bond with people and put aside conflicts.”
“Everybody wants to be unique, and that doesn’t always have to be negative,” she said. “But President Haverly [made it clear], to be able to live together in unison, we have to focus on similarities too.”
In illustrating his message, President Haverly told a few stories to give light to his thoughts on being different yet very similar. He spoke about the differences students and staff of the Polynesian Cultural Center bring with them to the Center, yet they are all similar in one purpose of “One Ohana Sharing Aloha.”
As she reflected on those stories, Meyer said, “[At] BYUH it is so easy to get caught up with differences because it is so culturally diverse.
“But something I learned is when you look past these differences, you can bond with people on such a deeper level, improve your communication, resolve conflicts and help each other grow spiritually.”
Working in unity
Speaking about the magnitude of their calling as stake leaders and the work laid in front of them, President Haverly said the work requires effort from all of church members. “If we all pull together at the ropes of these stakes to stand up this tent, this refuge in the way the Lord has designed, first to be filled with this love, this charity, this aloha, and then as Moroni 7:48 states, [pray to the Father with the energy of heart], we shall see Him as He is and have eternal life.”
Amanda Haverly said, “[President and Sister Haverly] are so nice, funny, loving and the most humble couple you will ever meet. They are not just YSA stake leaders, but parents to a great family.”
Speaking about these great leaders, Amanda Haverly said, “They’re always inclusive of everyone and [leaders] who always make sure no one is left out. I look up to them as a great example of Christlike people.”
Meyer added, “The best thing we could do to help stake leaders is to uplift the people around us, attend meetings and activities regularly, follow their council and fulfill our callings.
“I think an encouragement I would give to others would be it’s okay when we mess up. That is part of our earthly experience. It’s important we deal with what we messed up.”
Acain-Flores said she learned a lot from the devotional. “To understand the differences and to appreciate the similarities, we can reflect on our own experiences serving missions and see how we worked with investigators and how we appreciate their path to making sacred covenants.”
She emphasized despite how different people may be, “the similarities they all share can be an ingredient for unity.”
As she thought about how to apply the principles taught, Amanda Haverly said, “If we are living on-campus or off-campus, [we can] show love and gratitude to our roommates despite our differences.
“We can find ways to serve our spouse so we can help build Zion in our homes. We can create a spiritual and peaceful home and family.”