BYU–Hawaii students and LDS Church leaders said they believe love and marriage can eternally evolve and grow. Scientists have conducted research that validates these views through analyses of biochemical processes in the brain.
“We are born to love,” said anthropologist Helen Fisher. “That feeling of elation that we call romantic love is deeply embedded in our brains.”
Psychology Today reports, “Love is one of the most profound emotions known to human beings. For some, romantic relationships are the most meaningful element in their lives, providing a source of deep fulfillment.”
Chance Owen, a freshman from California who has yet to declare a major, said, “Love is a wholesome attraction. Meaning it is physical, emotional, spiritual, and mental.”
Biochemistry can help explain the chemical aspect of loving, stated a BBC article titled “The Science of Love.” In the article, researchers explained how attraction is made manifest by the orchestrated release of a group of neurotransmitters called monoamines. In the company of a “significant other,” the brain releases dopamine, resulting in a euphoric state of mind.
This particular neurotransmitter is also activated by cocaine and nicotine. Norepinephrine (adrenaline) is subsequently released, causing people to perspire and their heart rates to increase. Lastly, serotonin is released, acting as an anti-depressant. This stew of chemicals creates the romanticized sensation of “falling in love” within the psyche, the article explained.
Recent research done by doctors at the Department of Psychology at Stony Brook University in New York State revealed the symptoms of “intense romantic love.” These include craving for union, focused attention, increased energy with the partner, motivation to do things that make the partner happy, and sexual attraction and thinking about the partner when apart.
However, BYUH students said they feel love transcends physiological sentiments. Vania Tlapale, a junior from Mexico majoring in graphic design, explained, “I think love is one of the greatest blessings that we can have in our lives, and I think that love is not only an emotion, but it is also like a set of daily acts. You can’t say to a person that you love them and not do anything to show this love.
“I think that love makes you do things that you never believed you were capable of doing, and you are happy because you are doing them for another person, not for yourself. This makes you happy… This is love.”
Within the LDS community, Church leaders encourage long-term, eternal relationships. In a recent “Face-to-Face” web broadcast, Elder David A. Bednar and Sister Susan Bednar addressed the topic of love.
Sister Bednar said, “People don’t fall in love. You pick someone with whom you can create the love that you desire. So we’ve spent 40 years of being married and creating that love, and I can honestly say that we are more in love today than we were 40 years ago.”
Elder Bednar continued, “The word ‘love’ is both a verb and a noun. Sometimes, we think we have to have the feeling before we start ‘doing’ love. Now, I don’t want this to sound unromantic, but the ‘feeling’ follows ‘love the verb.’ And so, we find young people all over the world who think, ‘Well, I have to find the one and true and only.’ More correctly, you have to become ‘the one and true and only’ through what you do and what you become. I think you create [love]. You don’t find it.”
Lydell Lawrence, a senior majoring in international cultural studies from Nevada, echoed the thoughts of the Bednars and said, “I know love is an action, but to me, love is always evolving. My wife and I have been married almost 10 years now. The woman I married, she’s changed and evolved, and so has my love for her, and I think it just continues to evolve as we change. I love my wife so much for the woman she has become and for the woman that she’s going to be in the future.”
The research being done by psychologists gives scientific validity to the views of Lawrence and the Bednars.
Psychology Today reported on a study suggesting that one particular brain region, the ventral tegmental area, which is involved in a cognitive reward system rich in dopamine, is highly active in the minds of lovers who have been in a relationship for years, as well as those who have been together for weeks. This study suggests passionate feelings of young love can and often do persist in long-term relationships.